"Its Wednesday...........This Shit Is Random"

I just dont know sometimes lol. Am I the only one that doesnt know if there coming or going? lol Its like everyday I wake up get in my car. Come to a place that I call work. Get there only to socialize with people I really have no interest in conversating with. To listen to people bitch an moan over stupid shit. Leave from work then go threw wateva else I had on my agenda for the day. Then back to the place I call home. I swear I live in my car. I drive more then I sleep. I dont think getting up an leaving out the house at 7am to return back home by 10:30- 11pm is healthy.

I'm trying this new diet. Okay not diet. You can say that I exercise more then I eat. Yea I know real stupid. Hey... I dont wanna end up like my father. This guy is gone tell me you can't run from it. Its in your genes to be big. I looked at him an said yea okay, not I sir. I mean theres nothing wrong with being fat. Its just not my foretay. Especially in this lifestyle that I live nobody want somebody with too much or too little. Everyone has a preference so dont feed me the whole come as you are... they have to love you for you bullshit. Dont beat me in the head. I ran around the track the day before yesterday an it felt so good. I havent ran like that since high school.

People its tax season an im ready to collect. lol UNCLE SAM owes me lol. Social Security, Fica...etc I want it all. Im not going to spend it though im going to let it sit in the bank an chill. I been maintaining with my regular income so why splurge now, yo u feel me. I suggest you y'all do the same. The goverment is expecting you to give it all back. Dont be no fool lol.

Tonight my agenda is to pick up my cuzn from work and take my her to the dam mall,go see my friend (you know who you are), then leave there go see my other 2 best friends... were going out to eat (APPLEBEES).(wish me luck lmao). Then back to that place I call home. I wont be getting to sleep until 12am. Then yippeeee do it all over again. I'm Exhausted

I couldn't help but blog before the month was out. Im trying to post more then twice a month.



Until next time..............

I Got A Raise.....Should I Apologize....Friend....??

I'm so happy today. I just wanted to share my good news.
Yesterday I was called into a meeting with my Supervisor & My Director were they
discussed how much of a good job I am doing etc... Then the moment I been waiting for since the beginning of the New Year lol. I learn my new salary an my new goals set for me to accomplish during the course of this business year. Yayyy for me.

I am currently trying to raise the bar for myself. Every year brings new things and I'm going milk it for what its worth lol.

I have been having this issue with someone for about 2 months now. I think its time that I apologize for neglecting him for so long an tell him the real reason why I have become so distant. When he needed me the most i turned my back on him, only becasue he gave me his own ass to kiss. Now I'm wondering should I have did that an prolonged the situation. Now all I can do Is say sorry and hope the apology sounds sincere. I know he's hurting inside and needs to talk to me but i dismiss him as always because of reason im not stating for the whole world to read. Im an adult and im going to act like one and call him later on so we can go out to eat an talk over dinner etc....

Okay I have this friend (i think is my friend) I dont know whats his deal with me. One minute I think we cool then one day he throws me hella shade. Im confused am I ya peoples or am I just a name you know. I think this dude is a kewl kat an I wish he would open up to me more and talk to me more but hey I guess for the time being ill just take what I can get. I tried reaching out but no one was there to receive on the other end so hey whats a guy to do. I can't make everybody like me.

Until Next Time.............

I have alot on my mind this morning LOL

"Im Getting Sick.....I Feel Sick.....Im Just Sick......"

Im at work as usual I have a lot on my desk but hey what the hell I feel like blogging.

Im getting sick due to my nasty immigrant of a coworker. She is becoming a pain in the ass. Call me a racist dammit, but if you had to put up with the shit I deal with 5 days a week you would be fed up aswell. Okay she walks around coughing all day in everybodys face. Just yesterday as i was coming around the corner into the office , the bitch had the nerve to be walking an coughing, and mind you not covering her mouth. Mind you she has been sick for dam near 3months. I think chung lee got the bird flu or something cuz... this shit dont make no since. We had our weekly tuesday morning meeting today and i held the door for the females exiting the meetin, when it was her turn to pass through the door i wanted to slam it shut on that flat ass of hers. Im so over and she didnt even say thank you. I dont know what type of mannerism they teach in china but they need to get with the program.

I feel sick.... okay my dumb ass wanted applebees at 10:30 last nite. so I called my best friend "S" and he drove okay back story lol. Before we gort there he had to stop and gert gas lol. He rolled down the window and asked for 5 dollars worth of gas. I was saying to myself got dammit we not gone make it. but it did something for his 4 cylinder. shit not my V8 lol. anyway we get to the restaurant and My fat ass orders 2 chicken quesdilas lmao. By the time i got to the second one I felt a rumble in my stomache but like a true black person I tired to knock them down aswell. which i did anyway lol despite my stomache already in knots and we all know what applebees does to our stomache people lol. Need less to say as i got to my front door I was fumbling to get my keys out and head to the bathroom ,2 seconds longer I would have been the shitty best friend lol...If you missed that post reference "SHITS FUCKED UP".

Im just sick.... of being lonely. Im jealous of my friends relationships, Why am i so picky when it comes to love. Just about 90% of my exs are involved in happy realtionships. Im startn to think im the cause. I just cant seem to find anyone to hold my attention. Im trying to turn over a new leaf. I had to make some changes to my social circle. I love my Shawn,Fuzzy,Jay,Omar,Greg,Reggie,Charles,Stevenetc... If I didnt mention you I already got in contact with you. Nobody can replace them, they are very special to me....! I swear i felt so alone last saturday. I went out to eat by myself and I will never do it again lol. Nobody had time for me. This is why I need a steady shawty. I just dont get it. I make good money...I drive... pay majority of my own bills (live with parents)... I'm a good dude...I dont think im ugly, never been told that. I just wish things fall into place asap. Cuz I dont know how much longer I can take this shit lol. Back to work I go... Thanks for the feedback on my last post. I really appreciated it y'all.

Until Next Time.........

"THURSDAY BLUES (Reason Unknown)"

I'm feeling a lil down today. Reason unknown. Don't really feel like talkn to anyone by text, email, or by phone. I just need to be alone. When will I come out of hybernation I dont even know. Peace please come among me. I feel so helpless. My soul is turning black. My heart has hardened. My body is changing i feel like a butterfly emerging from a cocoon. Im happy now, sad later. Its getting dark. Im not scared. Hopefully tommorrow ill see the light. I live in a world of freedom but why am I so ashamed. I have nice things, I have someone who really love me. Why am I crying..... Why am I crying..... I ask myself, hold back that feeling. Just let go. Im happy again, now im sad. Fuck it now im mad.

I'm feeling a lil down today. Reason Unknown.