Let see shall we ...ummmm lately I have just been stressing man. Seriously you all know from my previous post that I sum times struggle with my sexuality but now the shit has just come full circle. Lately the female I have been talking to is starting to show me more and more affection and Im starting get more and more annoyed. lol I mean I really get upset to the point that I dont wanna be bothered. Its bad enough she calls me at work at least 2xs a day then wants to chill after work and that takes away from talking to my boyfriend when I get home because me and her wind up chilln till like 11 or 12am. I know trying to juggle the 2 is wrong but I have a good ass dude that understands my situation and allows me too carry on this way. I know some of yall are reading this post like WTF..Yes my dude knows I talk to ol gurl and was willing to take on the obstacle when he met me. I have been trying to slowly break it off with her for about 2 weeks now but the last convo I had with her telln her we should just be friends..Shorty told me I should rethink my answer...What is a man to do any advice for a brother???
Now on to my boyfriend...lately we havent been seeing eye to eye...I dont see him and he doesnt see me. We have been starting to question our love for each other. His love hasn't changed but lately I have been giving him doubt mine has. I'm trying to hold on to what little we have and make it work. He's the perfect dude, the most understanding person you could ever come to know. Its just lately I haven't been communicating with him...He feels like I leave him in the dark about stuff..I dont mean to do it on purpose...ughhhh nobody said relationships were easy...I guess ill take the blame for this one..sighhh
Moving on WHY can't I be happy...I tend to wanna be misserable sometimes or want a lot of drama to go on in my life....I know its crazy right???!! but alot of the situations that are occuring in my life right now, my dumb ass could of avoided the moment they arrised...I have been listening to Jazmine Sullivan lately and that chick can write. Lions,Tigers and Bears is speaking to a nigga werd up...
Next...I plan on moving out in June..good rite??? NOT. the catch is me and my cousin made plans to move in with each other a while ago..My cousin is you can say out to my family..but he has never admited it to certain people...I know when I tell my parents that im moving in with him Its going to raise some eyebrows...Im preping myself for the speech that im going to receive. The who,what,when,why and how questions. Im scared of being accepted by my parents..I still have time to back out of the situation to save face..My friends tell me all the time that onces you get out on your own and start paying your own bills that all that changes and you tend to not care about what people think. I hope that applies to me. Im startn to lean more towards dudes anyway...but until I cross that bridge ill just stick to the norm.
I have a question people....answer truthfully. I know I have male and female readers.
Do you trust your lover/wife/husband/significant other? Whether yes or no what makes him or her trust/untrustworthy?
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15 comments:
I'm single...don't trust no body. Just almost gave this dude my heart - he was on straight bull - I woulda been trying to bust the windows out on his car or something...good thing I held back.
Listen to your heart sir!
Damn u r heavy. Just be honest to yourself. One time I was that "understanding" dude too, and yeah, it was hard, and he chose the girl over me. But whatever, he was honest about it and we're still good friends to this day (and boy... he got some baby mama dramas, I'm tellin' you).
And communicate with your guy. I know often times that's easier said than done, but give it a good try.
There's never a good time to come out. And your folks probably already know about you anyway. :) Even if it turns out badly (like my own experience), I wouldn't take it back. Yes it was painful, but in the end it needed to happen and I'm a happier person because of it. Else I would've been miserably married to a white girl with 2 kids, or become a priest (yeah that was my mother's solution, forreal). All of this stuff is easier said than done, but be strong. We're all here for you!
Trust: Yes.
I think that just builds upon time. After a while you don't even think about it, it's implicit. I dunno... no magic recipe that I can offer, maybe I just got lucky.
And good luck with the moving! (go on and plan the move, you know you want to...)
Jazmine Is The Shit. Love Her Ass. Still Pissed She Didnt win Not one Grammy.... Bitches...
I say if you want to make it work with your BF be honest with him about your feelings before the "Dark" becomes distance......
I Say GO FOR IT and move the hell out. Ive been thinking the same thing that once I get out it wont matter and I think its true. If I were you Id Go ahead full steam.
Trust...... Ive Only Had One BF whose my Ex And I Didnt & Dont Trust Him At All..... I Did At One Point But I Cant Stand Liars.....
OMG! Welcome back Mister Negro! I was wondering if you had gotten lost and apparently you have been lost between a woman and a man.
Real talk let that woman go if you are still feeling men, in fact you have a beau, man you betta get your act together, the toss up between two is no good for the heart or mind it is an emotional rollacoaster.
X are we still playing with the dosage? man you are going to be on meds for real if you don't get control of those emotions, ask yourself "what do I really want?" You will be surprise how many people and things you can do without... Spring Clean!
I missed your black arse pimp during your absence, but now that you are back I look forward to reading your entries. oh by the way it appears that your friends and family do love you!
I trust my boyfriend. I'm not stupid. I look for signs and we keep the lines of communication open. We know where we fall short with each other and where we're fulfilling each others needs. We aren't perfect, but we try to make it work. Get your self together X...luv!!!
JB
I believe in the innocent until proven guilty theory when it comes to relationships. Although, I do keep my eye open for clues/signs/wonders. I think that you have to in this day and age.
With all of that being said, I believe that you must not treat them as if they are guilty if you are only under suspicion for infidelity.
N*ggas ain't shit, I'm sorry...lol
Q.... you're such an optimist... lol
Dusty, I know right...? lol
Your lack of trust stems from your inability to be trusted. It's odd, but quite the crazy circle...you can't be trusted, so you go through life believing others do and act as you do - hence rendering you unable to trust them. When you figure that one out, post about it. Jazmine is the shit. If you're wondering if your drama is self-created - let me be honest - it is. Deception, lack of respect for others and trying to have a successful fulfilling relationship with 2 people simultaneously is a breeding ground for disaster, so breed on. Good luck. Hopefully you'll look to the future and do yourself a solid - choose to respect yourself, your partner (male or female) and you won't wonder whether you're getting someone who's on the up-and-up in return.
Honesty Honesty Honesty! Have you tried telling the Girl how you really feel about her?
By the way, that Jasmine Sullivan album is the TRUTH!!
Good Luck!
;-)
I'm with Cocoa on this.
What's up X:
First, I just wanted to say that you have a very real and direct demeanor and you should be commended for opening your situation up to others. Its easy to internalize and shut everyone out, but you are trying to deal with everything in a good way.
I'm single, and I'll admit that after dealing with certain people I am very reluctant to trust others. That's something I will have to work on. However, in your case, all I can say is that you have to go with your gut. If a relationship seems unrepairable or a situation has become a lost cause (after many attempts), you have to evaluate whether its worth it. Most of the time, its not worth it. The second-guessing will eat away at you, and you won't even know if you can trust your own judgment, which is not where you want to be.
Juggling two different relationships is hard, and I can tell you want to be trust and be trusted, but there is a disconnect within your present relationships. Like many of the other guys have suggested, communication will be key to ensuring that the relationship you truly covet works in your favor.
In my last relationship, I was trying to salvage something that wasn't worth saving, and I wasted an entire year and a half doing so.
I was so fixated on what happened at the beginning of the relationship that I overlooked many signs that things had been going south. Don't make that mistake! Like I said before, just go with your gut. Your guy seems to be pretty accomodating and he needs to hear more from you about what tone the relationship should have. If not, he'll just withdraw even more.
You seem to have a good head on your shoulders, so I'm sure you will be ok.
Thanks for that insight JON and COCOA RICAN...dam thanks ALL lol..Yall have a brother over here thinking but ...UPDATE: me and my baby are fine and me and ol gurl are trying to remain just friends but of course she wants more...IDK
I do trust my lover/SigNig because he hasn't given me a reason to not trust him. We've promised to be honest, overly and completely. Its better that way to avoid wasting each other's time!
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