I received this today at work. I thought it would be nice to share. I got a lot out of this and wanted to see if it could do what it did to me to you and see what you get out of it. No matter how bad someone talks about me or etc.. Im still me and I'm special. I thank everyone thats around me for being my support. Okay enough mushy shit see below........
20.00
Sometimes we just need to be reminded!
A well-known speaker
started off his seminar by:
holding up a $20.00
bill. In the room of 200, he asked,
"Who would like this
$20 bill?"
Hands started going up.
He said, "I am going to give this
$20 to one of you
but first, let me
do this.
He
proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill.
He then asked, "Who
still wants it?"
Still the hands
were up in the air.
Well, he
replied, "What if I do this?"
And he
<>dropped it on the ground
and started
to grind it into the floor with his shoe.
He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty.
"Now, who still wants it?"
Still the hands went into the air.
My friends, we have all learned a
very valuable lesson.
No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value.
It was still worth $20.
Many times in our lives,
we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt
by the decisions we make and
the circumstances that come our way.
We feel as though we are worthless.
But no matter what has happened or
what will happen, you < /I>will never lose your value.
Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased,
you are still
priceless to those who DO LOVE you.
The worth of our
lives comes not in what we do or who we know,
but by WHO WE ARE and
WHOSE WE ARE.
You are
special
-
Don't EVER forget it."
If you do not pass
this on, you may never know the
lives it touches, the hurting hearts it speaks to,
or the hope that it can bring.
Count your blessings,
not your problems.
"And remember:
amateurs built the ark ..
professionals
built the Titanic.
If God brings you to
it - He will bring you out of it
Philippians 4:13 --- I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
The road to success is not straight. There is a curve called Failure, a loop called Confusion, speed bumps called Friends, red lights called Enemies, caution lights called Family. You will have flats called Jobs. But, if you have a spare called Determination, an engine called Perseverance, insurance called Faith, a driver called Jesus, you will make it to a place called Success
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
I Have A Fetish ......
Okay I waited all day to post this. Over the years my sexual petite has grown tremendously. I get off on the weirdest things like listening to a deep voice on the phone to listening to a nigga piss. Which lets me know his dick is heavy as hell. Very strange I know. LOL. I could be at work an I automatically get a hard on. It usually takes 15mins for it to go down.
Wow I cant believe im about to type what im about to type. I have been messing with dudes for about 9yrs now im currently 21yrs old as of september. I like the stranges things that just make me so aroused beyond my control. Its times I get so horny that I go on a rampage contacting all my old jumps offs to come jerk off with me. I'm so nasty. Like right now the shit going through my head rite now is off the charts. I love giving oral sex to both male an females. I love to eat ass to the point of no return. The thought of burying my face deep in someones ass just turns me on (Of course a throughly clean ass). I like having group sex 3,4,5,6 hell as many people as possible the more the merrier is my motto.
I recently have come to except my inner freak, which tends to be overwhelming at times. I'm nasty like LIL KIM "HARDCORE". I have a fetish that developed about 9 months ago. I met this 35yr old man from Plainfiled.said he wanted to test my freak so I said okay, but im already a freak you can't turn me out ima turn you out. He said we gone see lil man. I said aite I'm coming over he said aiite come on. I went over there we chilled smoked a couple cigarettes, had a lil sumthn to drink. Then he reached to grab me started rubbing my leg then started to kiss me. We winded up in his bedroom and him tossing my salad. I proceeded to suck his dick. Then he proceeded to prep me for a quick fuck. Lets jus say he hit a nigga off real good. LOL. Okay so we fuckn an then he starts suckn my dick then. Im like I gotta piss an then he says werd. Go ahead. I then proceeded to piss in this nigga mouth an he drunk every last drop. I was turnt on by this new found freakness that was bestowed upon me. He started jerking me off faster. Then he swallowed my nut. He was beating his dick as he was jerking me off. He got his nut off too. We both just layed there. On my way home I was still shocked at what just happen. Lets just say everytime we meet up thats apart of our routine. Its a name you call this type of fetish. "WATERSPORTS".
Now I ask you my audience to tell me WHAT IS YOUR FETISH?
Don't be scared. It took alot for me to write this. LOL. I had to switch it up a lil bit.
Until Next Time........
Wow I cant believe im about to type what im about to type. I have been messing with dudes for about 9yrs now im currently 21yrs old as of september. I like the stranges things that just make me so aroused beyond my control. Its times I get so horny that I go on a rampage contacting all my old jumps offs to come jerk off with me. I'm so nasty. Like right now the shit going through my head rite now is off the charts. I love giving oral sex to both male an females. I love to eat ass to the point of no return. The thought of burying my face deep in someones ass just turns me on (Of course a throughly clean ass). I like having group sex 3,4,5,6 hell as many people as possible the more the merrier is my motto.
I recently have come to except my inner freak, which tends to be overwhelming at times. I'm nasty like LIL KIM "HARDCORE". I have a fetish that developed about 9 months ago. I met this 35yr old man from Plainfiled.said he wanted to test my freak so I said okay, but im already a freak you can't turn me out ima turn you out. He said we gone see lil man. I said aite I'm coming over he said aiite come on. I went over there we chilled smoked a couple cigarettes, had a lil sumthn to drink. Then he reached to grab me started rubbing my leg then started to kiss me. We winded up in his bedroom and him tossing my salad. I proceeded to suck his dick. Then he proceeded to prep me for a quick fuck. Lets jus say he hit a nigga off real good. LOL. Okay so we fuckn an then he starts suckn my dick then. Im like I gotta piss an then he says werd. Go ahead. I then proceeded to piss in this nigga mouth an he drunk every last drop. I was turnt on by this new found freakness that was bestowed upon me. He started jerking me off faster. Then he swallowed my nut. He was beating his dick as he was jerking me off. He got his nut off too. We both just layed there. On my way home I was still shocked at what just happen. Lets just say everytime we meet up thats apart of our routine. Its a name you call this type of fetish. "WATERSPORTS".
Now I ask you my audience to tell me WHAT IS YOUR FETISH?
Don't be scared. It took alot for me to write this. LOL. I had to switch it up a lil bit.
Until Next Time........
Friday, September 28, 2007
"It Could of Been Me"
This has been a hellafied week for me. I turned 21 last saturday, I've been on Jury Duty for the last 3weeks on a criminal case. (which has been on the news alot lately). I broke up with my bf thursday (*sigh*)Well here it goes....
Tuesday morning like I always do in jury duty while waiting in the jury lounge. I get a voicemail from a woman from the health office in newark stating that I need to give her a call as soon as possible. She has very confidential information that she needs to talk to me about. By now I'm puzzled as to what she has to tell me thats so urgent. She left a phone number to be reached at. I proceeded to call back an a woman answered the phone. I told her someone called from your office an said it was urgent that she speak to me. She asked do I know her name. I said i think Ms Alverez. She sent me to the ladys voicemail. I left my other numbers that i could be reached on.
A day has went by. I still havent heard from this lady from the day before. Finally thursday morning in jury duty again she calls. I answer she askes am I so an so. I reply yes she says she has to meet with me as soon as possible to discuss a matter involving myself. I was saying to myself is this real. How did this lady get my telephone number? How does she know my name etc... She said she couldn't discuss the matter over the phone and that we had to meet in person to make sure I was indeed so and so(me). I told her my home address an that we could meet there on my lunch break. She said okay ill be there by 12- 1230 I confirmed an that was that.
Now I'm sitting here thinkn oh my god whats wrong with me? I don't feel sick, I feel fine, What could it be? I was depressed the rest of the day. I texted my friends gave them bits an pieces of what had just had happen. One friend kinda put 2 an 2 together an was tryna get it outa me but. I refained from stating the details. I just told him Ill tell him later when I find out more info. I tried to maintain a normal day but just couldn't my mouth kept going dry just think of all the wrong things I shouldnt of been thinking of. I tried to think positive but nah.
Today, was the day I dreaded. I have never been more scared in my life except when It was time for me to get an ass whoopn on report card day. I just kept on thinkn the worst. I was anticipating 12 to come around so i could go meet this lady an she could tell me what the hell the big secret was. I left my job at 11;50 to take an early lunch. She called at 12 on the dot saying she was at my house. I got there she was sitting in her car. I got in. She told me the reason I needed to speak with you right away was because basically some one that you have came in contact with referred us to you that tested positive for HIV. My heart dropped, I got a big headache. I got so angry at myself. I kept thinking about what I did last Saturday on my birthday and if I put that person at risk and If I did, I would never be abled to live with myself. All I could do was ask myself who the fuck would do this to me. Who??? She couldnt tell me who? What? Why? When? Where?. I don't have unprotected sex. I have had my slip ups on the whole oral thing yeah. but very very rarely have I not used a condom. I try to pick an choose who i sleep with very carefully. I guess I haven't been doing a good enough job. Because I wouldnt be sitting in this lady car. She askes me personal questions an its one question I usually lie about Which is do you mess with M or F or both. I couldnt lie. I told her both. She asked did I use protection I explained Ive had my slip up once or twice. She stressed to me the risk im taking by not using a condom.
We talked she calmed me down. I told her about my school plans. I told her about me having kids etc. I explained to her that I dont know why I mess with you know... and she told me male on male contact puts you more at risk because its direct. She had me swab my mouth and we talked so more. Had to wait 20 mins to determine my fate. My heart was pounding, I kept putting ny hand in my head. Praying to god for forgiveness an repenting for my sins. After the 20 mins was up. She tell me that im negative. I am so relieved at this moment. To think some shit like this could happen to me. I never would imagine Id be in this kind of predicament. I told her an myself Im leaving the lifestyle alone. I feel that I can't trust anyone now. People need to know there status. I was tested in March 07. I tested negative. I know i could be just as much at risk with a female. Im sitting here right now blogging. Im about to compile a list of people that I actually had sexual relations with. Most of which I was in relationships with. Ima take this an learn form it\. Wrap it up. I value my life to much. I have to much to do and to see. I will not fall victim to the HIV/AIDS epidemic.
"KNOW YOUR STATUS. KNOW YOURSELF"
Tuesday morning like I always do in jury duty while waiting in the jury lounge. I get a voicemail from a woman from the health office in newark stating that I need to give her a call as soon as possible. She has very confidential information that she needs to talk to me about. By now I'm puzzled as to what she has to tell me thats so urgent. She left a phone number to be reached at. I proceeded to call back an a woman answered the phone. I told her someone called from your office an said it was urgent that she speak to me. She asked do I know her name. I said i think Ms Alverez. She sent me to the ladys voicemail. I left my other numbers that i could be reached on.
A day has went by. I still havent heard from this lady from the day before. Finally thursday morning in jury duty again she calls. I answer she askes am I so an so. I reply yes she says she has to meet with me as soon as possible to discuss a matter involving myself. I was saying to myself is this real. How did this lady get my telephone number? How does she know my name etc... She said she couldn't discuss the matter over the phone and that we had to meet in person to make sure I was indeed so and so(me). I told her my home address an that we could meet there on my lunch break. She said okay ill be there by 12- 1230 I confirmed an that was that.
Now I'm sitting here thinkn oh my god whats wrong with me? I don't feel sick, I feel fine, What could it be? I was depressed the rest of the day. I texted my friends gave them bits an pieces of what had just had happen. One friend kinda put 2 an 2 together an was tryna get it outa me but. I refained from stating the details. I just told him Ill tell him later when I find out more info. I tried to maintain a normal day but just couldn't my mouth kept going dry just think of all the wrong things I shouldnt of been thinking of. I tried to think positive but nah.
Today, was the day I dreaded. I have never been more scared in my life except when It was time for me to get an ass whoopn on report card day. I just kept on thinkn the worst. I was anticipating 12 to come around so i could go meet this lady an she could tell me what the hell the big secret was. I left my job at 11;50 to take an early lunch. She called at 12 on the dot saying she was at my house. I got there she was sitting in her car. I got in. She told me the reason I needed to speak with you right away was because basically some one that you have came in contact with referred us to you that tested positive for HIV. My heart dropped, I got a big headache. I got so angry at myself. I kept thinking about what I did last Saturday on my birthday and if I put that person at risk and If I did, I would never be abled to live with myself. All I could do was ask myself who the fuck would do this to me. Who??? She couldnt tell me who? What? Why? When? Where?. I don't have unprotected sex. I have had my slip ups on the whole oral thing yeah. but very very rarely have I not used a condom. I try to pick an choose who i sleep with very carefully. I guess I haven't been doing a good enough job. Because I wouldnt be sitting in this lady car. She askes me personal questions an its one question I usually lie about Which is do you mess with M or F or both. I couldnt lie. I told her both. She asked did I use protection I explained Ive had my slip up once or twice. She stressed to me the risk im taking by not using a condom.
We talked she calmed me down. I told her about my school plans. I told her about me having kids etc. I explained to her that I dont know why I mess with you know... and she told me male on male contact puts you more at risk because its direct. She had me swab my mouth and we talked so more. Had to wait 20 mins to determine my fate. My heart was pounding, I kept putting ny hand in my head. Praying to god for forgiveness an repenting for my sins. After the 20 mins was up. She tell me that im negative. I am so relieved at this moment. To think some shit like this could happen to me. I never would imagine Id be in this kind of predicament. I told her an myself Im leaving the lifestyle alone. I feel that I can't trust anyone now. People need to know there status. I was tested in March 07. I tested negative. I know i could be just as much at risk with a female. Im sitting here right now blogging. Im about to compile a list of people that I actually had sexual relations with. Most of which I was in relationships with. Ima take this an learn form it\. Wrap it up. I value my life to much. I have to much to do and to see. I will not fall victim to the HIV/AIDS epidemic.
"KNOW YOUR STATUS. KNOW YOURSELF"
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Mary J Blige
A woman of great talents. She is dubbed " The Queen of Hip Hop & Soul". None other then Mrs Mary J Blige.
She has made u dance in the clubs, partys, even riding in your car to making you cry from her mellow tunes. MJB is a trooper a victim of drugs, alcohol abuse and domestic violence she has been through it all, an became the beautiful woman we all know today.
MJB has been an inspiration to me since the first time I heard her voice. From " You Remind Me" to "Reminisce". My favorite MJB era was the year her " My Life" album dropped. It talked of relationships, pain and Joy. It seemed like every track on that album brought me out of sum kind of situation. It was like she was directly speakn to me. Now when I hear a Mary cd It automatically up lifts my spirit, gets me through the day.
MJB is a legend in her own right. She is someone from the past an present. Even though she is in her thirtys she as already reached that status. If you can fill up a room an have people crying to your song, your somebody. MJB is H.B.I.C.. She has had numerous hits just to name a few. "I Can Love U". "Everything", All That I Can Say, who could for get "Im Going Down". I choose MJB because she is living proof that there is hope. Through her music she continues to be an inspiration to people. She a young black successful business woman with no limits. With that said I'm at a point in my life that I'm about to "Breakthrough".
She has made u dance in the clubs, partys, even riding in your car to making you cry from her mellow tunes. MJB is a trooper a victim of drugs, alcohol abuse and domestic violence she has been through it all, an became the beautiful woman we all know today.
MJB has been an inspiration to me since the first time I heard her voice. From " You Remind Me" to "Reminisce". My favorite MJB era was the year her " My Life" album dropped. It talked of relationships, pain and Joy. It seemed like every track on that album brought me out of sum kind of situation. It was like she was directly speakn to me. Now when I hear a Mary cd It automatically up lifts my spirit, gets me through the day.
MJB is a legend in her own right. She is someone from the past an present. Even though she is in her thirtys she as already reached that status. If you can fill up a room an have people crying to your song, your somebody. MJB is H.B.I.C.. She has had numerous hits just to name a few. "I Can Love U". "Everything", All That I Can Say, who could for get "Im Going Down". I choose MJB because she is living proof that there is hope. Through her music she continues to be an inspiration to people. She a young black successful business woman with no limits. With that said I'm at a point in my life that I'm about to "Breakthrough".
Friday, September 14, 2007
Friday Night Blues
YUP, yet another boring Friday in the house, I'm sitting here in the dark blogging from my treo. I had plans but quickly dismissed those ideas. I texted my boy jay earlier. He's at church catchn the holy ghost. (Amen brutha) Cuz lord knows u need healing, all them demons in you lol. Fuzzy hasn't returned my text as of yet. (I mean did he get amnesia all of a sudden an forgot to hit me back lol). Anywho I'm turning 21 next saturday. Yay for me (finally). I'm trying to get it together. Not sure if I want a party with a naked stripper or go clubbn. Hell, all I need is some grey goose an cranberry. Thats a party all by itself.
My mother .......... (*sigh).
My mom(birth mother) is really starting to irritate the hell outta me. For the last 2yrs I have let her borrow over $500+ that she has yet to repay.Story behind that. I live with my dad ,step-mom and 2 brothers. My mother doesn't work (typical welfare recipient)4 kids currently living with her.She has a mental disorder.She gets very depressed at times an developes the mindset of a 5yr old. Anyway she sits on her ass all day long majority of the time if she not doing part time work. Borrows money from everybody in the neighborhood.(So Ashamed). I mean if you see me you wouldn't believe I was her son. I'm a well dressed clean cut kinda guy. You see her an your like WTFFF? I love my mom dont get me wrong but something has to give.
Am I wrong for being ashamed of the woman that gave me life? She use to have it together now she seem to let go. I went to visit her the other week an we were talking rite. Let me tell u what she did. I thought this was too funny.Okay she borrowed 55 cent in change from the girl next door.Then proceeded to send my little brother to the store. She told him an I quote. " E go to the store an get me 55cent worth of cheese." I looked at her an said "55 cent". How much cheese u think u gone get with 55 cent.lol Her response was "3 fuckn slices." I was so disgusted. Let me stop lol. Okay I'm done venting now lmao.
Until next time......
My mother .......... (*sigh).
My mom(birth mother) is really starting to irritate the hell outta me. For the last 2yrs I have let her borrow over $500+ that she has yet to repay.Story behind that. I live with my dad ,step-mom and 2 brothers. My mother doesn't work (typical welfare recipient)4 kids currently living with her.She has a mental disorder.She gets very depressed at times an developes the mindset of a 5yr old. Anyway she sits on her ass all day long majority of the time if she not doing part time work. Borrows money from everybody in the neighborhood.(So Ashamed). I mean if you see me you wouldn't believe I was her son. I'm a well dressed clean cut kinda guy. You see her an your like WTFFF? I love my mom dont get me wrong but something has to give.
Am I wrong for being ashamed of the woman that gave me life? She use to have it together now she seem to let go. I went to visit her the other week an we were talking rite. Let me tell u what she did. I thought this was too funny.Okay she borrowed 55 cent in change from the girl next door.Then proceeded to send my little brother to the store. She told him an I quote. " E go to the store an get me 55cent worth of cheese." I looked at her an said "55 cent". How much cheese u think u gone get with 55 cent.lol Her response was "3 fuckn slices." I was so disgusted. Let me stop lol. Okay I'm done venting now lmao.
Until next time......
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
"I Love Me"
I'm not gone change. I love myself, from my brown skin to my chip tooth down to my size 13 feet. I love me. I may curse a lot. Might even say sumthn stupid but I'm me. I'm human I make mistakes. I fall but I regain my balance an push full steam ahead. Wanna know Y cuz X gone b X. Can't nobody be me. Jus like I can't be U. People words may cut like a knife. but like a bleeding wound I clot. I try to keep my head above water. Someones always tryn to drown me. Belittle me, break me, Shake me. I'm like a glass half full.
I'm not your average 20yr old, I'm making it an I don't even have a college degree. Its in the process. I love myself to much to let anyone get to me, still my joy. I hurt in the midnight hour. I'm like a ray of sunshine in the morning. You see my many faces, but which one is the real me? X got a story to tell. I'm young, black and intelligent. Don't let the blogs determine what is under the surface. How do I come off to you? Am I a freak? yeah. Am I a hoe? If dats wat u wanna call it. Do I come across immature? Sometimes maybe. I don't use my age as an excuse for stupidity. Am I changing? Yeah but not for you. I'm changn for me. Like I said X gone b X. If you don't like my posts. Then don't entertain em. If you don't like me as a person dats ya business. I blog as a release. Its my personal storage. Where I can say, do and write wateva I please. This blog isn't intended for anyone in particular. Its me expressing various thoughts an feelings that have bottled inside. I write to avoid conflict. I'm like a match waiting to be sparked. Enough wind and ill start a wildfire. Embrace me.
Until next time..........
I'm not your average 20yr old, I'm making it an I don't even have a college degree. Its in the process. I love myself to much to let anyone get to me, still my joy. I hurt in the midnight hour. I'm like a ray of sunshine in the morning. You see my many faces, but which one is the real me? X got a story to tell. I'm young, black and intelligent. Don't let the blogs determine what is under the surface. How do I come off to you? Am I a freak? yeah. Am I a hoe? If dats wat u wanna call it. Do I come across immature? Sometimes maybe. I don't use my age as an excuse for stupidity. Am I changing? Yeah but not for you. I'm changn for me. Like I said X gone b X. If you don't like my posts. Then don't entertain em. If you don't like me as a person dats ya business. I blog as a release. Its my personal storage. Where I can say, do and write wateva I please. This blog isn't intended for anyone in particular. Its me expressing various thoughts an feelings that have bottled inside. I write to avoid conflict. I'm like a match waiting to be sparked. Enough wind and ill start a wildfire. Embrace me.
Until next time..........
Monday, September 3, 2007
Labor Day Weekend
Its monday people. Its Labor Day Weekend. A lot has happened since I last posted. I'm a uncle sis had the baby. oh yea my lil bro scare wit the STDs he good. I chilled in BK at peoples house , dude apartment was fire I'm still wowing over the elevator service to the kitchen..On a bad note a nigga is sick. My head hurt, chest hurt, nosed stoped up. I'm jus all fucked up.lol It sure ass hell didn't stop me from going out this weekend. Shit I got me some tylenol. took some penicilin ( that the doctor prescribed me 4 months ago) I know I'm not the only one that stores unused medicine lol.
Okay I have some peives that irk the hell outta my nerves.
1. I hate when someone telln a story then they stop dead sentence , like ooo let me tell u so & so said, then b like oops I'm not suppose to tell u. I'm like bitch then why the fuck u start telln me.
2. I hate when people ask to borrow money knowing they aint gone pay it back. Shit jus say can I have ,that way my black ass won't be looking to get it back.
3. I hate when I'm on the dam phone with someone. Then you hear the toilet flush. Im like, u was using the bathroom all that time, Nasty bitch.( I was wondern why u was so dam quite, bitch cuz u was concentrating to hard lol).
4. I hate when you at a restaurant an someone say "Can I get a cheeseburger with NO cheese." I'm like dam bitch jus say u want a hamburger. lol just stupid shit jus irks me
5. Okay fellahs stop saying pussy nasty. Nigga aint ate /taste a pussy a day in his life an saying pussy nasty. Eat it!!!! If you can suck a dick u can eat a clit. No fuck dat if you swallow a nut you can dam sure eat some cooche. Pussy don't stink except that one time I was drunk, nigga almost passed out from dehydration lol * flashback* ewll. lol.
What are some of your "PEIVES"?
Until next time.......
Okay I have some peives that irk the hell outta my nerves.
1. I hate when someone telln a story then they stop dead sentence , like ooo let me tell u so & so said, then b like oops I'm not suppose to tell u. I'm like bitch then why the fuck u start telln me.
2. I hate when people ask to borrow money knowing they aint gone pay it back. Shit jus say can I have ,that way my black ass won't be looking to get it back.
3. I hate when I'm on the dam phone with someone. Then you hear the toilet flush. Im like, u was using the bathroom all that time, Nasty bitch.( I was wondern why u was so dam quite, bitch cuz u was concentrating to hard lol).
4. I hate when you at a restaurant an someone say "Can I get a cheeseburger with NO cheese." I'm like dam bitch jus say u want a hamburger. lol just stupid shit jus irks me
5. Okay fellahs stop saying pussy nasty. Nigga aint ate /taste a pussy a day in his life an saying pussy nasty. Eat it!!!! If you can suck a dick u can eat a clit. No fuck dat if you swallow a nut you can dam sure eat some cooche. Pussy don't stink except that one time I was drunk, nigga almost passed out from dehydration lol * flashback* ewll. lol.
What are some of your "PEIVES"?
Until next time.......
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